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#395 + (-4) - [X]
<@hemp> S*N*O*W
<@Weebs> i'm jealous :( someone send me a picture of what it looks like
< VxD> it looks white and sparkly
< VxD> * . *
< VxD> . _\/ \/_ .
< VxD> \ \ / /
< VxD> .. .. -==>: X :<==-
< VxD> '\ /' / _/ \_ \
< VxD> \\// ' /\ /\ '
< VxD> _. __\\\///__._ * ' *
< VxD> ' ///\\\ '
< VxD> //\\
< VxD> ./ \.
< VxD> '' ''
< VxD> there, took you a picture
<@Weebs> some days I hate you
#313 + (-20) - [X]
< dgibbons> 6 days til my birthday
< dgibbons> I didn't realize ours were so close
< dgibbons> doodserz
< agilman> 25 days til my brithday
< teknotus> dgibbons: I think I want to move soonish.
< forkmaster> 10 months until my birthday!
< forkmaster> I didn't realize we were all so close
* agilman will be turning 21
< forkmaster> all of our birthdays are within a year of each other!
< teknotus> forkmaster: Holy crap

#245 + (-12) - [X]
< Baloo> Yay, the intermittant packet loss stopped again.
< rlangis> oh.
* rlangis puts his DDOS cron script back in action.

#333 + (2) - [X]
<@shiruken> well, look at Ben and I
<@shiruken> that's what you're headed for if you get married
<@shiruken> 3 kids and tricking 20 year olds into giving you their trash for no money
<@Nihilist> i hate you
#278 + (0) - [X]
< Sportbikerohni> I went up to my parent's house to store my trailer. I
locked myself out of my car
<@VxD> *grin*
<@VxD> and yet, you are able to use the internet...

#273 + (-7) - [X]
<Weebs> we just saw an accident outside our office
<shiruken> wow
<hemp> you saw it happen?
<Weebs> yeah I saw it happen
<Weebs> I was looking through the window at a sales woman...
<shiruken> was she hot?
<hemp> she was before the car hit her
#267 + (-11) - [X]
< noussquid> i had a guy who is now my husband do the nerdiest thing to my boob ever
< menion> Uh oh
< noussquid> he pressed on my nipple and said engage

#312 + (-13) - [X]
16:47 < gleesond> fuck I just got hit by a car while riding my bike
16:48 < gleesond> I'm ok but that was lame
16:48 < dgibbons> gleesond: don't ride in traffic next timje and i wont hit you
16:49 < gleesond> LOL
16:53 < gleesond> All I was worried about was my laptop and it seems to be ok
16:59 < forkmaster> the medics come and he's like, "I know my leg is broken,
but can you check my laptop first?"
17:01 < dgibbons> hah
17:02 < gleesond> seriously thats what it was like!

#266 + (-9) - [X]
< tacodog> it's free vasectomy day here at planet argon
< tacodog> i got a message on my machine last night. wrong number (I hope) from some doctor's office confirming my vasectomy appointment today
#23 + (-11) - [X]
<wilco> I like Latin
<karrlii> me too.
<karrlii> you know what i also like?
<karrlii> legendary pink dots
<karrlii> they just came on my ipod
<karrlii> they were in portland recently. i went and saw them. it was awesome.
<karrlii> i feel very clipped today.
<nihilist> i like latin too..
<nihilist> ./porn/Redhead with latino guy.mpg
<nihilist> ./porn/Young.Tight.Latinas.5.by.Salseros.CD1.XviD.ShareConnector.avi
<nihilist> see!
#268 + (-10) - [X]
< jvoorhis> what is orlug?
< dgibbons> a irc channel
< jvoorhis> i saw :P
< dgibbons> it's the non lug affiliated oregon linux user group irc channel, it's never really linux related though
< dgibbons> lug-nostic? O.o
< dgibbons> It's like a blackhole in irc
< dgibbons> you put time in.. and you never see it again
< dgibbons> somehow the irc-gamma rays make you feel dumber too

#359 + (-12) - [X]
tacodog40k: what's new wif you?
IamLordV1ldemort: What's your email, personal email?
IamLordV1ldemort: I will send you a boxee invite.
IamLordV1ldemort: oh, i joined Facebook
IamLordV1ldemort: *sigh*
IamLordV1ldemort: Too much family there.
tacodog40k: hah
tacodog40k: i saw that. i don't have a facebook account and your request made me wonder if i should set one up.
IamLordV1ldemort: Oh fuckign hell
tacodog40k: xxxXxxx@yahoo.com
IamLordV1ldemort: FUCK FUCK FUCK
IamLordV1ldemort: yeah
tacodog40k: !
IamLordV1ldemort: So
IamLordV1ldemort: I clicked to upload my contact list, and it seemed to hang, so I cliked ggain
IamLordV1ldemort: Fuckin thing somehow took both events (eventually) and fucking
IamLordV1ldemort: FUCK
IamLordV1ldemort: sent out email to my whole fucking contact list =(
tacodog40k: hahah
tacodog40k: sorry
IamLordV1ldemort: LKML, Python List, 3 gentoo Lists, Dell Hardware, etc, etc,
etc, etc Linux-Net the list goes on.
IamLordV1ldemort: OMG
tacodog40k: holy cow
tacodog40k: hahaha
IamLordV1ldemort: ~1m people.
tacodog40k: holy
tacodog40k: ahahhaahah
IamLordV1ldemort: Yeha
IamLordV1ldemort: so
tacodog40k: *wipes away tears*
tacodog40k: i'm laughing so hard, i scared the dogs
#302 + (-5) - [X]
* lispy is hoping his internet potential gf will login to AIM
< Kool-Aid> e-galfriend!
< lispy> yeah
< lispy> she e-seduced me!
< lispy> and i want to e-jaculate all over her picture

#61 + (-35) - [X]
< karrlii> i'm buying this couch this weekend
< karrlii> http://www.dwr.com/productdetail.cfm?id=5226
< karrlii> just so everyone knows
< VxD> man you are always buying something
< VxD> I bought something last night...at dollar tree
< karrlii> it's sexy!
< pr0kfried> that just looks uncomfortable
< karrlii> haha it does not!
< karrlii> it gives lots of snuggle room
< VxD> that's a lot of money for a twin bed with a roll pillow
< pr0kfried> translation: we can do it on the couch A LOT
< Nihilist> agreed
< VxD> when modern goes too far...
< Nihilist> I've got this.. artisitc.. old fridge that brok... is art..
i'll sell you for $1500... it even comes with smells!

#55 + (-19) - [X]
<Nihilist> we could add a column for news poster and have it in the layout instead of you typing --vxd each time
<VxD> doesn't really matter, but if you want to add it go ahead
<VxD> I don't really have to say --VxD either, who cares
<Nihilist> *shrug*
<VxD> yeah, that's minor
<Nihilist> i like minors
#363 + (-10) - [X]
< whodevil> no
< whodevil> no
< whodevil> sexualized children
< whodevil> naked

#281 + (-3) - [X]
<Baloo> Jeff's teaching himself how to wel.d
<Baloo> agilman and swoolley know who I'm talking about.
<lispy> shiruken: oh :(
* lispy teaching himself hydrokenesis
* lispy hurls a waterball at #orlug with only his mind
<lispy> *splash*
<jbooth> make: *** No rule to make target `umbrella'. Stop.
<VxD> oh my, and here I was wearing this white tshirt with no bra,
<shiruken> VxD: now I can't get that image out of my mind
<VxD> I know, I'm irrestible
<lispy> haha
<jbooth> rdfomh: password all wet

#20 + (1) - [X]
<VxD> would you could you with a whore, would you could you against the door?
<VxD> you know, dirty Dr. Seuss just seems to come naturally
<rlangis> I would do it with a whore, I would bang her up against the door
<rlangis> I would bang her all night long, I would bang her in a throng
#154 + (-25) - [X]
< kraptv> I just posted a staff-wide email request wanting a brick phone.
< thumper^> heh
< thumper^> You're going to have a hard time finding a carrier for that
< kraptv> You imply I am going to use it as an analog cell phone.
< thumper^> Well, what else? Going to nuke your nuts with it?

#329 + (-9) - [X]
< NotoriousOIT> mmm bacon
< fords> i mean, i do love bacon.
< NotoriousOIT> who DOESN'T?
< VxD> it doesn't love me
< fords> yaweh
< fords> but i'm dead on my feet already. do i have time for bacon?
< NotoriousOIT> it's like concentrated deliciousness
< NotoriousOIT> true, cooking bacon is not recommended when you're
< fords> i'm not THAT exhausted, but even still. that's work.
< fords> i dunno. i think i am gonna do it.
< NotoriousOIT> it's not recommended to cook bacon in the nude either
< fords> strike 2!
< NotoriousOIT> you only need to make THAT mistake once
< VxD> grease burned nipples
< NotoriousOIT> that's exactly what happened
< NotoriousOIT> and it HURT
< VxD> you might say...crispy nipples
< NotoriousOIT> ow.
< VxD> KFC Crispy Nipples! bet you can't eat just one!
< fords> NotoriousOIT: i don't spend much time thinking about your
nipples, but you've just brought to the front of my mind that particular image.
< VxD> I could see them selling in a two-pack
< fords> ...with strips of bacon tastefully draped across them.
< VxD> ( . ) ( . )
< VxD> Baconini is the latest swimwear rage!
< NotoriousOIT> hahaha
< fords> goddamnit! this flexible ice shit thaws in an hour, and takes
two hours to freeze
< NotoriousOIT> that particular comment needs pics
< VxD> you could go canadian bacon for the boobs
< fords> no, regular bacon.
< fords> hands down.
< VxD> then a strip bacon g-string
< VxD> talk about edible underwear!
#205 + (1) - [X]
* thumper^ has a palm he never uses
VxD> you jack off with your feet?
#50 + (-9) - [X]
< nate> the good thing about a mac mini is that it's really easy to throw
#155 + (-44) - [X]
06:12 < thumper^> linux is the festering shit that spoils the minds of today's geek youth

#109 + (-8) - [X]
User wangstick joined channel #G4TechTV
<wangstick>god i've been banned like 6 times this week from this thing
<wangstick>for almost nothin
<wangstick>nazi mods
<baloo>I guess you almost need to stop doing that then, wangstick
<wangstick>but im only expressing my opinion ;_;
<wangstick>and i get banned
baloo laughs!
<baloo>If I wanted your opinion, I'd give it to you. 8)
<wangstick>are you talking about
<Dan_Sgambelluri>!kb wangstick evading ban0
ChanServ sets mode +b *!*@pcp07840731pcs.wilmsc01.tn.comcast.net on #G4TechTV
wangstick has left the chat (Kicked by ChanServ. Reason: (Dan_Sgambelluri) evading ban0).

#156 + (-9) - [X]
06:09 < shiruken> I think because it's closed source, it's against my morals
06:10 < shiruken> if I ever have a problem with photoshop, or wish to add a feature, I can't
06:10 < thumper^> You buy photoshop, you give money to adobe. it givew money to employees, employees give money to local economy, local economy grows.
06:10 < shiruken> and because I can't, the world is deprived of a better peice of software
06:10 < thumper^> How is thatnot helping
06:10 < thumper^> You think like a programmer, I think like a normal human.
06:11 < thumper^> I don't code anythign but web sites.
06:11 < shiruken> that run on apache and linux :)

#215 + (2) - [X]
<lispy> GiR: tell cwells about chill the ham
<GiR> lispy wants you to know: chill the ham is, like, happy talk for buttsex
<cwells> is that an offer?
<lispy> GiR: tell cwells about offer
<GiR> lispy: sorry...you suck
<cwells> wow
<cwells> that's an offer
#130 + (15) - [X]
< VxD> I hate working all of a sudden at this time of night, all I want
to do it eat munchies
< HentaiJess> you should watch some pr0n. that'll keep you from being
hungry...at least for munchies, anyway
< rlangis> who's been doing lines of catnip, eh?
< rlangis> yeah, try to sound authoritive with your pants down around
your knees in front of the computer
< HentaiJess> can you check the fan? it seems to be making this weird
"fap, fap" noise....

#30 + (11) - [X]
<Weebs> I can't remembermy router pw
<VxD> let me see if I can hack it
-:- SignOff Weebs: #sportbikesnw (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
#301 + (0) - [X]
< fords> i know the feeling
< fords> i know it like a junkie knows junk
< IamLordV1ldemort> bbut fords , I just want to kow _why_ you put it in your arm and shoot it up?!!?!
< IamLordV1ldemort> huh?
< IamLordV1ldemort> Were you raised that way???
< IamLordV1ldemort> NO!
< fords> ...yes, actually, i was.
< shiruken> my dad said, "Son, you're 16 now. Time to tie off daddy's arm"
< fords> hahaha
< shiruken> which was good
< shiruken> it got me off of spoon and lighter duty
#286 + (31) - [X]
<shiruken> break in the back
<shiruken> like you normally do
<VxD> I thought you were hinting at brokeback for a second there
<dooder> VxD : that might be cool. I think i'll at least try and get the holes dug this weekend
#193 + (-9) - [X]
< nate> yay. happy birthday to me
< lispy> nate: congratulations you slice of shit, you're a year closer to death

#358 + (-2) - [X]
< dgibbons> Weebs: so when you going to see your new digs?
< dgibbons> basement or bedroom!
<@Weebs> :( dunno. Seriously the idea of moving is like a fat chick in a g-string to me
< dgibbons> cmon you pussy
<@newtMcKerr> so Weebs you must be pretty excited then

#305 + (0) - [X]
<baloo> http://www.thinkgeek.com/homeoffice/lights/8f1a/?cpg=48H
I might have to get one of these.
<baloo> I keep sleeping through my alarm clock
<CryptoMole> cool clock
<baloo> Yeah.
<kraptv> hi clock lover
<CryptoMole> wow cool geek toys here
<NotoriousOIT> mmmm....vibrating alarm cock....
<baloo> I like how my alarm clock gets progressively louder, but the tone sucks so I usually put it on the radio, and I like how I can adjust the snooze time, but the problem is it still gives up after 3 tries.
<NotoriousOIT> *CLOCK*

#234 + (-12) - [X]
16:30 < absolutejoe> Oh ... did they move it to Thursdays ... hmmm ... well,
that interferes with my dancing schedule ;-)
16:30 < jax0m> you dance?
16:30 * jax0m cringes
16:30 < jax0m> like, ballroom?
16:31 < mackstann> oh shit, i like dancing too then

#4 + (1) - [X]
23:27 <largos> hm... I'm a bit curious where those messages are.
23:27 <lispy> they will come through
23:28 <lispy> i did a cvs something or another the other day and it took
like 20-30 for it to show up in my inbox
23:28 <largos> yeah, like a herd of turtles stampeeding through
23:28 <lispy> ah, they're so cute!
23:28 <lispy> GiR: look!
23:28 <GiR> lispy: sorry...you suck
23:28 <lispy> {}: dances with turtles
23:28 <{}> lispy: I want something that turns mere turtles into four
foot tall ninjas or something.
#153 + (12) - [X]
<matchboy> hurt me.
<VxD> you heard us talking about gay man spanking earlier didn't

#298 + (9) - [X]
<@Weebs> effing hell man if you're going to post a pic of yourself with a
naked chick at least make sure it's a good pic of a naked chick
<@hemp> exactly
<@VxD> totally
<@sab_> you pimp what you got, and thats as close as he got
<@VxD> some crazy Ashland Marti Gras
<@Weebs> seriously, my penis is trying to go inside my body now... canine style
<@VxD> ...
<@Weebs> it's like a tube of lipstick :*(

#39 + (0) - [X]
<shiruken> so, I talked with a kernel developer this morning
<shiruken> relating the Randal story
<shiruken> and he goes, "oh, tell me when your next meeting is
<shiruken> he wants to come
<VxD> shiruken: that's hot!
<VxD> the next meeting date is on...my wife's birthday
<VxD> frickin' luck
<linuxninja> shiruken: awesome
<charlieS> what's more important? Linux, or wife?
<VxD> well linux of course, but don't tell my wife that :)
<VxD> she calls my computer my mistress
<charlieS> once linux can suck you off..
<charlieS> lol
<VxD> and I have 4 mistresses at home :)
<VxD> I have a computer harem!
<charlieS> schwweeeeet
#122 + (-8) - [X]
< matchboy> does it ever not work? (the monitor)
< matchboy> or is it just dark
< thumper^> When it doesn't work, it's black as your mom's boyfriend.

#13 + (-6) - [X]
<floppyfw> the awesome Mandrake 8.1 system that can run apt-get
<VxD> god, that is sick floppyfw
<floppyfw> ya I know
<floppyfw> I'm apt to try it someday
? VxD slaps floppyfw with a copy of debian
#242 + (-11) - [X]
<@Weebs> girls making out is porn if it is in color
<@Weebs> girls making out in black and white is art

#296 + (9) - [X]
< cwells:#orlug> i like to sit at home and count my balls, over and over
#63 + (-6) - [X]
< rlangis> god I hate working friday and saturday nights
< rlangis> not that I'm a social butterfly, but it completely kills any
*chance* of going out
< wilco> And getting laid
< rlangis> well I'm married, so no chance of that

#197 + (-8) - [X]
<shiruken> how many guys like girls who wear pigtails and dress up in a school girl uniform?
<shiruken> are they pedophiles?
<shiruken> you don't see girls asking you to wear a peter pan outfit
<Weebs> short skirts and handlebars... It's not about being a pedophile... it's about convienence

#257 + (-8) - [X]
<@Weebs> cobol doesn't run on linux right?
<@VxD> your mom runs cobol
<@Weebs> thanks bastard
<@Weebs> so what distro is my mom?
<@VxD> slackware :)

#8 + (-15) - [X]
<VxD> damn Blackbox is hung
<rlangis> put away the ruler, VxD
#135 + (-5) - [X]
<shiruken> I was told that I'm not flexible and conversant with my
<shiruken> that they want someone to talk to them before I jump in
and fix their problems
<shiruken> they want...
<shiruken> Romance
<VxD> I think they mean you don't give good head
<shiruken> nah, this is before foreplay
<VxD> there is something before foreplay?
<shiruken> yeah, dinner
<shiruken> dancing
<VxD> "I bought you Taco Bell, let's fuck
<shiruken> saying sweet words in her ear
<shiruken> "You ordered the lobster! You better swallow"
<shiruken> I like the girls line, "I won't give it up to now,
that'll make it more special later"
<VxD> "It can be special every time"

#328 + (-9) - [X]
<@VxD> I wonder if a cockring could be considered "band" "width"
#316 + (-12) - [X]
< absolutejoe> I really enjoy filling out employment questionaires ...
< VxD> you should have it down to a science by now
< absolutejoe> I like questions like this:
< absolutejoe> Experience deploying IT, networking and voice
< VxD> I bought some IT at BestBuy once, but it didn't work out, they
wouldn't let me return it either
< absolutejoe> I deploy my voice over the network all the time ... and IT
usually works fine.
< VxD> I often deploy voice over cat3 whenever I answer the phone
< absolutejoe> I usually deply my voice OTA
< absolutejoe> deploy even
< VxD> wow, wireless technology!

#236 + (-20) - [X]
< cactus> i must cook sausage soon. gian kielbasa shall be mine.
< kraptv> Poor guy can't have the hotties eating it.
< cactus> yeah. it sucks having a girlfriend.
< cactus> you can't randomly hose around.

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